


Keep Me In Mind

by MarsFlameSniper



Category: Persona 5
Genre: Ann always has a solution though, F/F, Femslash February, I suppose this is very mild hurt/comfort?, Makoto doesn't like being alone
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-06
Updated: 2018-02-06
Packaged: 2019-03-14 11:22:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,331
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13589001
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MarsFlameSniper/pseuds/MarsFlameSniper
Summary: For Makoto, the prospect of a week away from Ann is...not good.





	Keep Me In Mind

Makoto felt Ann’s lips press gently against hers, unable to stop the slight tremor in her jaw at her girlfriend’s fond smile once they parted. Ann ran her thumb across the skin there, and she couldn’t help but lean into the touch, doing her best to block out the noise of the crowds behind them, and the roar of the trains beginning to depart.

“It's only for a week Mako-chan,” she reassured her, “I bet you won't even notice I'm gone.”

“Of course I will.” Makoto replied quietly. Pleased as she was that Ann had landed such a big contract to model with one of the country's top fashion magazines, the fact remained that the shoots would be taking place in Okinawa. For a week. A whole week in which she wouldn't see her girlfriend's peaceful sleeping face in the mornings, or exchange kisses with her before she headed to the station for the day. No delighted surprise in her smile when she'd come home from work early to take her on a date, and no whispered echoes of passion as they made love and she was able to rediscover everything she loved about Ann over and over again.

She didn't want to ruin the mood though, Ann hadn't stopped buzzing since she'd gotten the call from her agent about the shoot a month ago and she'd packed and repacked a hundred times over. But try as she might, Makoto couldn't stop the glum downturn of her lips as she thought about spending a week without her.

Rubbing her arm reassuringly, Ann began to say something, but the voice from the p.a. overhead cut her off.

_“The train for Haneyada Airport will be departing momentarily from gate 4, please make your way there now. The train for Haneyada...”_

Her mouth snapped shut, and for a second she seemed conflicted. She ducked down to catch Makoto's eye as her face fell.

“I can stay...if you want.”

Makoto considered asking her to for a moment. She knew Ann would, too. She’d stay, and wouldn’t breathe another word about Okinawa, wouldn’t let it even cross her mind…until about a month later when she’d see the shoot advertised on a convenience store magazine rack, and her eyes would show her heartbreak even if her smile deflected any concern.

This was everything Ann had ever wanted from her career. There was no way she could ask her to stay. So instead, she heaved in a breath and pushed the sadness back so she could focus on Ann, forcing a smile she shook her head.

“Don't be silly, this is your big chance! I'll be fine. I promise.”

Ann kissed her once again, and Makoto responded in kind, hoping that everything she wasn't able to say would reach her. That she'd miss her like she'd miss a limb, that she loved her...

All too soon they broke apart, Ann backing away to head for the platform. Their hands lingered together for the briefest moment, and then before she knew it, Makoto was staring at Ann's back as she dashed for her train.

A shiver went through her, and she pulled her coat tightly around her shoulders as the crowd swallowed Ann up. And then all she was doing was standing alone as people jostled her left and right. Swallowing heavily, she walked back to where she'd parked her bike, heading for home. She tried to ignore the lack of pressure around her waist and the way the wind chilled her back without Ann there to keep her warm. She'd been riding motorcycles since she'd been old enough to get her license, and yet the whole trip home felt surreal. Like she'd swerve and tip over at any moment because the bike was just too damn light with only one person riding it.

On a whim, she detoured to a convenience store, grabbing several packs of the strawberry milk sweets she knew her girlfriend would often munch on.

She'd taken the day off from work to see Ann off, and once she returned to their shared apartment she was at something of a loss. Cooking just for herself seemed pointless, and her head just wasn't in looking through the reports she'd taken home.

Deciding on a movie to pass the time, she grabbed the first DVD her eyes landed on and settled back onto the couch, candy in hand. Five minutes in though, and her attention had already wandered. She fiddled restlessly with her phone, tapping out a message on impulse.

**To Ann:** _Miss you already x_

She knew Ann was already up in the air, that she was probably dozing and wouldn't check her phone until much, much later, but that still didn't stop Makoto from glancing at her message screen every few minutes after she'd hit send. An hour passed like this, the film totally unwatched and her neck developing a strain from twisting it down so often. Finally she slammed her phone onto the coffee table and turned off the TV.

“Stop being stupid.” She muttered, desperate to find another distraction. Swiping a book that had been left on the table, she thumbed through it. The taste of the candy had coated her mouth with a sickly, strawberry-flavoured layer of sugar and though she tried to lose herself in the tale before her, all her mind drifted back to was the way the same flavour was often on Ann's tongue when they kissed.

“Damnit.” The book was also tossed away and Makoto sighed restlessly. She was unsure of what to do.

“You lived practically by yourself for how long? And now you can't handle one week on your own? Grow up Makoto...” Grabbing her phone again, she flicked through her contacts until she came to her sister's name.

Sae picked up on the third ring, sounding somewhat distracted as she did.

“Sae Niijima speaking...”

“Sis?”

“Oh!” Makoto could almost see her sister double-taking at the caller ID. “Sorry, I didn't think it would be you calling.”

“Is this a bad time?”

“No no, just busy with some work. What did you need?”

What she needed honestly was a distraction. But even years after they'd made up for their differences, Makoto still hesitated when it came to talking to her sister. As all conversation starters fell from her head, she blurted out one of the few constants they'd had together.

“D-do you want to come over for dinner tonight?”

There was a pause from the other end of the line, until Sae responded back apologetically.

“I'm sorry...I actually can't. I have something of a date this evening, so...”

“A date?” Makoto blinked. Sae had never shown interest in dating for as long as she could remember, this was beyond unexpected.

“Yes, well…” she cleared her throat loudly, “the invitation was rather sudden, but she promised to show me a good time so I accepted. I'm not really sure what to wear though, I think she mentioned dancing?”

“Wow, that sounds nice.”

“It does, doesn't it?”

Makoto smiled at the note of happiness she could hear in her sister's voice. If whoever had asked her out had already provoked that kind of reaction, she approved.

“Maybe you could come over this weekend instead and tell me about it?”

“Of course, I'd love to. But I should get going now, I really do have a lot to finish up before tonight. Unless you needed something else?”

She held back a sigh. Sae appeared calm, but Makoto knew the subtle tells of her sister’s excitement…she hardly wanted to ruin the mood by unloading her own troubles down the phone.

“It's nothing, don't worry. I just wanted to see how you were. Have a great time tonight sis. Love you.”

“I love you too. Bye.”

Ending the call, Makoto rubbed her eyes with the backs of her hands. She was happy for her sister...she really was. But right now it was hard to feel enthusiastic about much of anything. The rest of the day stretched out before her. As did the silence.

 

* * *

 

 

Try as she might to distract herself, by the time Makoto finally went to bed, she was miserable. Though she'd ended up cooking after all, eating alone had hardly been enjoyable. The quiet around her turning what would have been an otherwise lovely meal into bland mush in her mouth. Not since she'd lived back in Shibuya with Sae, after their father had died, had she felt a quiet so oppressive.

Turning in early, she'd hoped to get this first awful day over with, so she could distract herself with work for the rest of the week. Unfortunately, as she'd curled in on herself to sleep, her mind seemed to grow more alert. She and Ann rarely slept apart anymore, so the sensation of having their bed to herself was not a comfortable one; her brain pointing out every single thing missing: the lack of warmth between her arms as she held Ann close. The absence of legs tangled with her own. Even Ann's hair, so flyaway once released from its pigtails that it tickled her nose, was an unwelcome departure from the norm.

She tossed and turned and tried to get comfortable, cursing herself for forgetting how to cope. Eventually she lay on her back, eyes wide open in the dark, staring at the ceiling and wishing for the night to end.

Finally, Makoto fell into an uneasy slumber. Every hour or so she woke again, disoriented as she felt the empty space beside her until she remembered and returned to her fitful rest. At some late hour, she couldn't say when, it was instead the buzzing of her phone woke her rather than her own agitation, and she fumbled with it tiredly, eyes scrunched shut against the bright display.

“Hello...?”

“Mako-chan...I jus’ got your text. Wha's the matter babe?”

Her eyes slammed open as she registered Ann's voice, whining involuntarily once she realised what Ann had said.

“I'm sorry, I sent that hours ago. I thought it had reached you already. Are you alright? Sorry if it woke you...”

“ ‘s fine.” Ann mumbled, and Makoto smiled warmly at her sleepy responses. Ann was never too coherent after she'd woken up.

“You alright babe?” She asked, her voice a whisper. “You sound sad.”

Gulping audibly as the question brought back every feeling of misery she'd felt ever since Ann had let go of her hand, Makoto sniffed, surprised to feel a tear falling down her cheek.

“...I’m being stupid.”

“I miss you too.”

Makoto pulled the phone away from her ear for a moment, resting her forehead against the display. Wishing she could somehow tumble through the screen and be wherever Ann was right now.

“I miss you so much.” She whispered.

Speech came from the other end of the line, and she held the phone back up again.

“I got something for you. It was going to be for your birthday really, but I think you need it more right now.”

There was a rustling, presumably as Ann moved to a more comfortable position, before she spoke again.

“There's a box in the back of my side of the wardrobe. Take it out and bring it to the bed.”

Doing as she was told, Makoto looked through the wardrobe, the box obscured by some of Ann's longer dresses. She pulled it out and brought it back, sitting cross legged on the covers with the box in her lap.

“Got it.”

“Open it up. There's something at the bottom.”

She did so, smiling as she saw Ann's old Shujin blazer at the top, along with other knick-knacks from her school days. Rummaging through, her hand landed on something soft and she pulled it up, gasping once it was finally revealed what the present was.

“Where did you get this?” she exclaimed, “I didn't think these were even made anymore!”

In her hand was a stuffed Buchimaru-kun toy, almost the size of her head. But she hadn't thought the little panda mascot had been profitable in _years_ , she never saw any of his merchandise anymore. So how had Ann-?

“I take it you like it then?” she could hear the teasing smile in her voice, but she was too flabbergasted to play along, turning the panda this way and that and hugging him experimentally. He was so soft!

“Helloooo? Earth to Makoto? Are you there?”

“I am! Sorry! I just...how?”

“I have my ways.”

She pressed the panda to her face, her nose picking up Ann's scent almost immediately. She nuzzled the toy happily as Ann spoke again.

“I know it's not really a replacement...but maybe he can keep you company? And you'll have something to hold at night while I'm not there.”

She barely knew how to respond, choking out words of thanks around the small panda while Ann chuckled.

“It's okay babe, I understand.” She yawned loudly. “You should get some sleep now, okay love? I should too...we both have to be up early.”

Makoto nodded, closing her eyes. She didn't want to have to be responsible; all she wanted was to stay on this call with Ann until she was back on a plane to Tokyo. But the toy in her arms grounded her, kept her from voicing her thoughts and told her to be brave instead.

“Goodnight Ann. I love you.”

“Goodnight, I love you too. Buchi-kun will keep you safe while I'm away okay?”

“Okay.”

She kissed her fingertips and pressed them to the phone, before ending the call with a heavy heart. Crawling back to the head of the bed, she settled herself under the covers, arm tight around Buchi-kun. Closing her eyes, she pressed a kiss to the top of the panda's head, letting herself become lost in Ann's scent again as sleep finally came. The next week wouldn't be easy, but perhaps it didn't have to be so hard, either.

**Author's Note:**

> I sort of feel like, you don't go through (what I assume since the game never mentions it) the loss of your mother, then of your father and then living with your emotionally distant and often absent sister without developing some abandonment issues. It's rough.  
> Anyway I hope people like this, I've not posted in a while because I'm working on something pretty big...but I wanted to try and get one or two things out for femslash feb.


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